|Posted on 5 November, 2019 at 14:10|
I was out for a walk one day this summer and I noticed a father and his two young sons riding their bikes. In single file, dad at the back, the youngest son in the middle and the older son quite far in front, they looked like they were having a good time. Then, the youngest boy turned around to look at his father and enthusiastically yelled, “Dad! Look how fast Trevor is going!” Almost immediately after those words came out of his mouth, he lost his balance and fell. Not seriously hurt but crying loudly, dad got off his bike and comforted the boy.
Until he shifted his focus, the youngest boy was balanced and moving forward nicely. But the minute he paid more attention to his brother’s ability than his own; things went sideways.
As I continued my walk, I thought: how many of us do the same thing? How often do we shift our attention from what we ourselves are doing and place it on the actions or words of others? And don’t things tend to go sideways when we do that?
I met with a couple this summer about officiating at their wedding. The bride began talking, gossiping really, about her maid of honour. Bright woman that she is though, she almost immediately stopped herself in mid-sentence and said, “Sara, stay in your own lane.” What a fantastic phrase.
So, what does staying in my own lane mean? It means that I focus my attention on what I am doing, saying and thinking. It means that I consciously decide how I want to respond to situations. It means that I operate and communicate, to the best of my ability, with integrity and honesty. Most of all, it means that I pay attention to what I am attracting and creating in my life.
Ernest Holmes writes, “We are all chemists in the laboratory of the Infinite. What then shall we create?” Well, what have you created? Positive, happy, healthy experiences? Prosperity, harmony and overall wellbeing? Or have you fallen off your bike?
An example. Maybe someone has criticized you and you feel hurt. But focusing on the words of another for any length of time or blaming them for what you are feeling is not staying in your own lane.
Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Know that you can replace the word inferior with hurt, used, angry, fearful, disappointed, etc. It’s a one size fits all statement. So why not look in the mirror and ask, what in me attracted that behavior or this situation? Ask this question not to blame yourself but rather to empower yourself.
I believe that our real deep work is done in the silence of our own hearts and minds. It is done between me and Me – my human self and my Higher Self. Yes, others can be there for me, tell me I have been wronged, provide an ear to listen with and a shoulder to cry on. But ultimately, it’s me that must eventually look myself in the mirror and be accountable for what I’ve created. If I feel hurt because of something someone said, it that means that the words of the other person are simply mirroring a limited belief I have about myself.
Remain focused on what you want to create. Always remember that you are a child of the Divine, not only intended to succeed but already a success in every way. Affirm that others treat you well, making sure that you first treat yourself well.
Ride straight, move forward, focus always … and stay in your own lane.
Copyright 2019 © Julie Tkachuk